“You will never be completely at home again because a part of your heart will always be elsewhere. That is the price you pay for the richness of loving and knowing people in more than one place.”
As I spend my last few days in North Carolina, I can’t help but feel the bittersweet emotions of moving onto the next chapter by having to leave people and places I’ve come to love here. It’s an emotional dance that I’ve been spinning to since the first time I left home to go to college, and then two years later when I sought out what life had to offer in Yellowstone. By leaving my home and making one elsewhere, it becomes difficult to say goodbye to either. I may have chosen a lifestyle of travel and constant changes of scenery, but I’m not sure if the ‘saying goodbye to the places I come to call home’ part will ever get any easier.
Closing certain chapters in our lives becomes an inevitable part of our existence, but these are the crucial opportunities to learn, grow, and move forward in the directions that we are meant to.
This past chapter of my life was a necessary one of personal development and healing. Discovering a home in North Carolina this year was life’s way of putting me into a situation to truly heal a part of me I thought was lost, grow into who I am meant to become, and confidently move in the direction that I am meant to follow. Life has a funny way of presenting us with these types of opportunities; only we must choose what to do with them.
Perhaps having pieces of my heart in different places will always come at an emotional price, but I can’t say I regret my decisions to seek out more. It’s a strange balance of feeling so fulfilled each time I travel to a new area, and feeling so sad when I have to leave it. Maybe it’s okay for me to feel like home exists in more than one place, and with more than one group of people. And maybe it’s okay to feel that home is a fleeting concept entirely.
At the end of the day, I can only choose to feel hopeful as a beautiful new chapter of exploration awaits me, and I will soon come to call another place home. As we all face different chapters in our lives, I hope that the growth and fulfillment will always outweigh the sadness from turning the page. May you always feel at home, no matter where you are.